Once there was an ex-Muslim

His name: Faheem Kazeem

He loved his England so so much

He yearned to serve the queen

On the streets and on the news

And in his party meetings

He’d have his fellows roaring out

And thousands with his Tweeting

“I’m the son of an immigrant

A freshie from the ‘Stan

My dad arrived illegally

Off the back of a transit van

I love my England so so much

But my own people don’t make me happy

I don’t mean lefties or the queers

I mean all my fellow Pakies!

Throw them out the lot of ‘em!

Send them back to Islam

Send them back to their mullahs!

And their bands of the Taliban!

They don’t want to integrate

They’re living off the state!

If you think I’m talking tripe

Well, I’ve lived with them mate!

They just want to turn our land

Into an Islamic state

If we’re not so careful

They’ll turn Bradford into a kalifate

They don’t want to learn our language

They don’t want to respect our laws

They prey on all our little girls

And keep their women indoors.

Make them speak the English language!

Make them change the Quran!

Make them more and more like us!

Then England won’t be harmed

I love my England so so much

I don’t want it to change

But now when I look at Birmingham

It’s become somewhere quite strange

Kick them out the lot of em!

Before they turn England into hell

In fact, if you’re acting for our realm

You can kick me out as well!”

The crowd erupted roaring out

Carrying him on their shoulders

Faheem Kazeem beamed with pride

As the crowd cheered border to border:

“Kick ‘em out for Engerland!

Kick him out as well!!!!

Kick ‘em out for Engerland!

Kick him out as well!

Kick ‘em out for Engerland!

Kick him out as well!!!!

Kick ‘em out for Engerland!

Kick him out as well!”

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This entry was posted in comical, narrative poetry, Poems, Political, satire and tagged , , by Novid Shaid. Bookmark the permalink.

About Novid Shaid

I am a Muslim writer and English teacher. I have written poetry, short stories, a play, and I am currently working on a novella. My subject matter and themes are related to Islam, Sufism, politics and also my job as a secondary school teacher. My work is copyrighted and any works published here may not used or copied without my prior consent. You can contact me via the "Contact Me" page, if you wish to use any these writings. I am keen to gain the notice of publishers and if any are interested in my writings, please contact me via the "Contact Me" page. Was salaam, Peace


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